wMy favourite villain – and the villain I would choose to be would have the power of passive aggression.
This villain is the worst. So much so, you’re not even sure if they’ve complimented you, or ruined your life.
They leave bitchy postit notes on the fridge door, shouts out ‘THANKYOU’ when you don’t hold the door for them; they ruin your day without you even realising they’re responsible.
In this modern day where superheroes and villains hide in the shadows of everyday life, PassAgroGirl conceals her villainous side by publicly classing herself as ‘sassy’.
She’ll fight with words and tear people down with utter confusion. The evil parts inside you will want to laugh – because let’s face it, it’s impressive – whilst the rest of you tries to figure out whatever just happened.
She’ll make you uncomfortable in lines as she tuts and sighs in your ear till you leave and miss out. And block you in with her car cause you parked in her favourite space – making you late to see your baby being born, which your wife will never forgive you for.
For her biggest enemies, they won’t even know they’re on her target list. Hurling months of anger and rage at them in one simple ‘IM FINE’ whilst giving them a look so intense they’ll be restless for their whole life; just waiting to see what her attack will be.
She’ll secretly resent everyone who employs her to fight their battles with the superheroes of the world, but will never tell them about this resent, because, whatever it’s fine. You know, I don’t even need to finish this. I’m done. Have a nice life.